SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I am 4 years out from Dday and have learned more about Infidelity than I had in the last 30 years. Before it hit home, I knew what it was but had no idea the disruption and pain that it causes and how much it changes you. I am so thankful for the SI forum as it has shown me that I am not alone in my journey. The stories, the frustration and the pain that is shared seems endless on here. Most of us trying to make sense of something that makes no sense to us. Searching for fairness from something that doesn't fight fair or follow rules. Asking questions and grasping for advice when we need it. Infidelity will leave a mark on everyone it touches but it doesn't have to dictate the rest of our lives. In my particular case, it took something as tragic as infidelity to bring about change in our marriage. Yes, my wife made the choice to be unfaithful but there were things that I needed to change as a husband too, understanding that nothing I did or said justifies her choice to be unfaithful. In the end we turned something terribly bad into a better version of ourselves and our marriage. As I have discovered, infidelity is unique to the people involve and one shoe does not fit all. There are so many different outcomes but there is one thing that we have all shared from this and that is the pain, frustration and disruptions of our lives. " For Better or Worse" is a fitting line in marriage vows as we now have experienced what can happen when things get tough in marriage and the poor choices people make at those times. I wish there was no need for this forum but I am thankful for all the people who have helped me and continue to help me. Infidelity is gut wrenching, not fair and makes no sense and there is so much in our lives we do not have control of. Letting go of the past is hard but it can be done. The choice is yours.

Lost1313